Welcome To The Kwik-E-Mart!
To properly hype the forthcoming The Simpsons Movie feature film debut this summer in true fun Simpsons fashion, select 7-Elevens across the nation may be refitted outside to look exactly like Indian manager Apu’s legendary convenience heaven. The irony of course is that the Kwik-E-Mart itself was inspired by 7-Eleven convenience store chains. Now it looks as if life will indeed imitate art – animated artwork that is courtesy of Matt Groenig’s brainchild and Fox studios.
The deal hasn’t been officially sealed yet, but if all goes as planned, about 11 stores across the United States will be made to resemble the cartoon store which has served Bart and his buddies greasy tofu dogs, fiery hot beef jerky and perhaps the most signature frozen confection in all of cartoon history – the famous Squishee – patterned of course after 7-Eleven’s Slurpee.
Not only will the outside of the stores be made to look like Springfield’s favorite retail hangout, but customers will be able to purchase actual items inspired by and found in the Simpson’s universe including caffeine loaded Buzz Cola, sometime dangerous Krusty O’s Cereal and the iced fruity flavored concoctions known as Squishees. ” WHOOO-OAH BOY that’s good Squishee!” as Bart once cooed after downing one of the brain freezing treats.
The revamped stores will also use pictures of Simpson’s characters to hawk 7-Eleven products of fresh foods like having Homer grace the packaging of popular sandwiches. Margaret Chabris, 7-Eleven spokeswoman, said contracts on the promotions have not been signed with the movie studio. She didn’t give any further details, saying the company will release more information soon.
This is a great idea for fans, but I wonder how 7-Eleven employees will deal with their new Simpson’s digs. The look isn’t much of a change for them, after all 7-Elevens and Kwik-E-Marts share that same gaudy convenience store ambience, but what about Apu’s catch phrases? If they really want to immerse us in a Simpsons like experience, clerks should mimic some of Apu’s most memorable sayings.
“I have been shot eight times this year! And as a result, I almost missed work!”
“I take it from your yelling, that you like my tofu dogs.”
“It is a great dishonor to my ancestors and my God, but OK!”
“All Kwik-E-Mart managers must be skilled in the deadly arts.”
And of course last, but not least, “Thank you, come again!”
The Simpsons movie hits theaters on July 27.