It’s only human to get down on yourself once in awhile. Should you be concerned if your friend, family member or spouse struggles on a regular basis with self esteem? Absolutely. Low self esteem can lead to a whole host of other issues such as drug abuse and unhappy relationships. People who committ sucide aren’t exactly thrilled with themselves beforehand. In mental illnesses such as bioploar disorder the mind may exaggerate just how awful life can be leading to a suicide attempt. A person with low self esteem may find their opinions of themselves goes from better to worse in a heart beat. A person’s out look starts to improve until the bills are due or until someone close to them starts in on them. This is just one example of how fragile the human brain can be
in an individual who suffers from depression [not to say that it doesn’t take a lot of strength to deal with such a condition.}
How can you tell if the problem is truly low self esteem? If you have reason enough to wonder about someone’s self esteem there you have it. In females low
self esteem may present itself in the form of promiscuity. Of course, some people simply have a high sex drive. However, a young girl or woman who continues to put her health and reputation at stake isn’t likely to feel very good about herself. It’s not unusual at all for a female to seek out male attention in order to compensate for feelings of inferiority. The woman may assume sex is the only way she’s going to get the attention all human beings need. This is usually a result of someone cutting her down. Ladies we’re not the only ones who fall into this trap. Men and teen boys aren’t always acting out sexually just on account “boys will be boys”. Males who refuse to take care of the children they’ve fathered.. Men who committ crimes against women… Men who brag about sex… none of these men are healthy sexually/sicologically. So, please if you recognize any signs of sexual responsibility in your son sit him down for a talk. Don’t forget to bring up how he feels about himself. Men and women both use sex as an outlet for stress and a means of dealing with low self esteem.
People generally have difficulty hiding their feelings of low self worth. Women may tend to focus on their appearance as though one blemish or a couple extra pounds were the end of their social life. Females who don’t have a strong academic back ground or who have trouble making and keeping friends may put too
much emphasis on their outward appearance. Often, these girls would have a lot going for them upstairs if they’d focus on developing their talents as much as they pay attention to their outward appearance. Of course there are women who feel bad about excessive acne or way too much weight instid of making up
a physical flaw that doesn’t really exist. Still, low self esteem may be the culprit [not that you’d have to low self esteem to have such an issue with weight.} In this case take care to watch your tounge and gently ease them into the process of finding solutions for the problem when they bring it up. Or you can simply listen to their concerns; allowing them personal space as far as deciding how and when to clear the acne up. You might offer a facial, but don’t make it seem that they really need it. Just be girls together. Female bonding helps with self esteem. If your sister is always complaining about her weight it’s perfectly acceptable to ask her if she’d like to join you for your evening walk. In the case of women who think they’re fat or ugly when they’re really not try telling the truth. Mention anerexia or body image distortion. Never agree with a person about weight when they’re only a few pounds over what they think they should be. Don’t tell them their concerns are justified when they’re really not making sense. Don’t enable an eating disorder. The consequences are too great in the long run. If you’re dealing with your own body image concerns and you don’t feel you can offer a healthy example as far as body image just listen. We can learn about ourselves from listening to our friends and family members. If you’ve already been through it offer up sound advice or don’t say anything at all. You might want to just say you’ve had your own issues with body image or if you don’t know anything about the subject admitt it. Honesty is valuable.
What causes a person to think so little of themselves? I hate to play the blame game; especially since in adulthood it’s each person’s responsibility to overcome the bad habits learned from our elders during childhood. There’s just too many wounded adult children out there not to say something about the way we should treat our children. It’s true that kids get their self esteem from their parents. I’ve seen too many people struggle through life, constantly falling back on what they were taught about themselves during childhood. Parents, aunts/uncles, cousins, grandparents, siblings, friends/acquaintances and teachers all play a part in building or braking a child’s self esteem for a lifetime or at least until the time comes to rise above the short -comings of others.
We all know from experience that people with low self esteem can be a drag to have around. So, how do you help someone calm down? They may insult themselves so often you beging to think they hate themselves. Don’t allow anyone to bring you down. Just be firm that you don’t agree that they’re so bad. If a friend was abused as a child remind them when they bring it up that the person who abused them was sick. Let them know what you’ve done to improve your own self esteem. In the long run you can’t change a person’s opinion of themselves if they’re not willing to do the work.
If you know for a fact that someone is contemplating suicide please be human and address the threats being made. Never assume that the girl next door wouldn’t kill herself once the threats have been voiced or shown in some way. Even the most handsome, talented among us could be capable of suicide if they get low enough. Have a heart to heart to talk with them. Make sure they promise before the end of the conversation that they won’t do anything rash. If they’re underage be sure you tell an adult. If you’re a teen who knows an adult who is suicidal tell someone who is of age. If your neighbor calls you up and admitts to being suicidal tell one of their closer friends or family members who are willing to check in on them. Always take suicidal threats seriously. If your child is suicidal don’t blame yourself. PArents are only human. Sometimes things get by us. You may think your child is happy, but if you find out they’re not so well adjusted consider that kids are very sensitive and they take everything to heart. Just because your kid complains you work too much and they’re lonely doesn’t make you a bad parent.It makes you a busy parent. Remember, all the people who interact with your young person help to shape the person they grow into. There may be a problem at school. Find out what’s going on. In the midst of coping with a loved ones depression blame isn’t the answer. Prompt action is the answer. Focus on your child’s needs instid of your own hurt feelings. If your child needs more help than you can give him or her there’s no shame in getting the help needed from an outside source such as a doctor, counselor or family member/friend who may be able to assist in helping your child get their emotional needs met. They say it takes a village to raise a child. I agree.
Remember, we’re all only human. Give yourself a break.