After ruining his uppity reputation by taking me to a gaudy dive in Ft. Lauderdale, someone figured he best try like hell to save himself. This is how we ended up the following night at the fabulous Eden Roc in Miami Beach. I’m not being facetious at all, it was absolutely gorgeous.
From the minute you hit the Eden Roc’s beautiful circular drive up until checkout, you are treated like royalty here. I was almost embarrassed to be pulling up in my old car. The temporary heap was not running real well right then… I reluctantly handed the keys to the very nice valet (who managed to not even wince), and our luggage was taken by yet another gentleman. We didn’t have to lift a finger until we left the next day.
Checking in was swift and friendly, complete with upgrade to a high floor with an ocean-view balcony due to the male’s golden tongue. Our luggage made it to our room within 5 minutes where we were shown the various amenities and told to just give a ring should we need anything else. I quickly closed the extensive mini-bar before the male could start guzzling beer.
But let’s go back to the lobby first… wow. Expansive, gorgeous, high ceilings… bronze statues on marble pillars, a sunken center with comfy couches and chairs for sipping your cappuccino from the coffee bar, and floor-to-ceiling windows. Before dinner they serve free glasses of wine here, too, and are anxious to answer any questions you may have.
Outside the elaborate lobby to the back are several fountains ala Puck which served as great amusement to us… you would think that such a posh place could find a better place to run those feeder tubes through… poor guys all seemed to be enjoying their enemas though.
Ok let’s go back up to the room for a bit… (Does it take anyone else an hour and a half to change for lunch? Odd phenomenon, that…) Speaking of beds… this was absolutely the most comfortable bed in existence. It’s the kind of bed that once you sit down you simply cannot get back out of it on your own. You must be coaxed and pried out. the bed is just that comfy. Heaven. I really wanted to spend the entire time in this bed…
The one downside to this room is perhaps that headboard. Don’t get me wrong; I loved the white curly thingy and matching mirror. Very femininely kicky. But, well, there just is no place convenient for handcuffs… shame, that.
We had a full walk-in closet complete with a bathrobe for each of us. He was so taken with this room that I had to keep talking him back out of it (the closet, that is… ba dum bum). There was a safe in the closet also, along with an ironing board.
The shower/bath had oodles of hot water and very nice pressure. We were left with a very nice quality shampoo and separate conditioner, lotion, shoe buffer, shower cap, and 2 soaps of the variety that do not dry your skin out. There is, of course, a blow dryer. They also have a free shoe polishing service if you leave them outside your door in the bag provided.
Our full balcony overlooked the ocean and the large pool at oceans edge. You can rent a private cabana for the day at $55. Perhaps had we gone on and rented one, we would not have later been thrown out unceremoniously from one of the two hot tubs at pool’s edge. (That man, ya can’t take him anywhere…)
There is a nicely done cafe/bar next to the pool and overlooking the shore. Since we were still pretty full from our wonderful lunch with a friend, the elegant main dining room seemed like a bit much to us (Salmon dinner for two: $135). We opted for something lighter at the seaside bar. He ordered a delightful Cuban Sandwich, while I went straight for the good stuff… a very nice warmed Angel Food cake which came with two huge slices and all sorts of nice things on top and on the sides like strawberries and blueberries and sauces… oh my! Our waiter was fabulously flamboyant and on the ball. This guy did not miss a trick.
The Eden Roc boasts a full health club for members only. You can get a pass from the beach house for free daily use if you are a hotel guest, though. They have a beauty salon and full spa with an array of packages which struck me as a bit pricey, so we passed on those.
There is a small but nice gift shop in which you can get souvenirs of your stay, papers and magazines, drinks, snacks, and anything you may have forgotten to bring with you.
The Eden Roc has both a ping-pong table and a foosball table out by the pool… The male declined getting his butt annihilated at foosball. He did, however, wish to play fireman in the elevator… Hey, really, it’s not his fault there’s a separate button just begging to be pushed in there.)
Since this is beginning to feel like a novel, I’ll just leave you with a rousing 5 out of 5 star recommendation. When in Miami, do try to stay here. Our room had a rack rate of $450, but you can occasionally find a great deal on Priceline… like our $79. Score.
4525 Collins Avenue – Miami Beach, Fl 33140