In this article I will be sharing some vague details of my life over the past couple of years. In that time, I did a lot of things that I am not at all proud of. Now I am dealing with the consequences of those thoughts and actions. I have learned that becoming a man is not very easy. In fact it can be very difficult.
There is a lot of non-sense on the web about how to become a man or what men are. I am speaking of a real man mind you. In my search to learn how to be a good man I have come across web sites that showed men how to become a man by manipulating women, better ways to lie or impursunate what women want out of a man but not actually being that. This is not what I wanted. What I wanted is to become a real man. So far, I believe a real man to be him of integrity, (http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/integrity please look it up if you have any questions or doubts of what it may be) who stands up for what is right. Who is honest, and humble, who is not prideful.
I want to talk about that for a moment. Pride is dangerous problem I have seen in my life as well as other men that I know and from what I have heard from a woman. After looking on http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/pride pride is very selfish. The problem with pride is it lacks humility. Take this as a grain of salt, but to me pride is the opposite of humility. I just checked out this website ( http://www.rootswomen.com/articles/FalsePride.html) that more defines false pride for what it is. Pride is the absense of humility. Where humility is about the welfare of others, pride is about the over importance of self. Example, I’ve been in arguments that I felt I had to be right, even when I know there was a chance I could have been wrong. Example, I have done something that I wanted to do because I didn’t want the things around me to change.
I have seen far more pride filled men than women. Why? I’m still looking for the answer.
I see that I have done a lot of things out of pride and I tell you the truth, out of an experience, that if you continue to function being filled with pride it will be a battle to be yourself. I mean who you truly are and not who you are because of what you have, or what you’ve done, or what you want to do, or what people say about you or the things that people say that you are capable of, or this or that etc… The point is be true to yourself. Be honest and upfront about your feelings and emotions. Don’t hide thoughts or actions, and don’t withold details, because the fact is with all that hiding from yourself, you’ll probably lose yourself and who you were in the first place. And it would be a shame if you never knew who you where before you let pride mask the truth because now I have to find out who I really am and not what I have believed myself to be.