My wife wants to go back to the gym. For her, working out has always been a cycle, and that cycle came to a screeching halt just before summer started. I can understand that. You want to relax a bit and sip a margarita and not feel guilty about it. So it’s normal that – physically – a person may let themselves go a little bit between early June and late August. Spending every waking moment at the beach does not necessarily mean you are exercising. So it seems right that as we slowly transition into the months of autumn my wife is starting to think about going back to the gym. This year she wants to do something a little different than just step-aerobics and peddling a stationary bike. I think I have just the thing for my wife and hundreds of women just like her:
Aerobic Pole Dancing
Call me silly, but I’d have never believed it if I hadn’t seen it with my own eyes on a late-evening talk show. The same moves you see strippers perform as they shimmy up and down a pole – and which hypnotically convince men of all ages to eagerly throw down their hard-earned dollars – is the basis for a unique form of aerobics that apparently is making believers out of thousands of women across the US and abroad.
According to program I saw, pole dancing builds muscle, liberates a woman’s mind and increases their sexual energy, not necessarily in that order. It is only because I am a strong believer in all three areas that I called my wife over to the television so that we might be enhanced together.
I’m impressed that are now “pole gyms” in cities all across the United States. That alone is filling a need – because think about it – where do potential strippers go to learn the art of “working a pole” so to speak? I always imagined that a wanna-be stripper just picks up the techniques of pole dancing from older more veteran strippers. But then again, why would the old guard want to share its secrets with some young whipper-snapper who can snatch away those dollars?
But that’s beside the point. What is interesting is that just in case a woman can’t go to an established gym, they can purchase a “portable pole” and set it up at home and pole dance along with a video. Or maybe they can attend a “pole party” at the home of someone who can demonstrate what pole dancing is like.
“You should try this…” I encouraged my wife. “We can order the pole and set up on the patio and uh…you can practice along with a video…naturally I’ll help you because I don’t want you falling on your head.”
I’m not sure my wife was convinced. We continued watching the program.
I think we were both impressed. There are moves with such names as the “rocking cat”…the “snake dive”…the “cork screw”…in addition to basic pole climbing techniques and I tell you they look easy but are probably difficult as all get out to learn. I don’t think the whole pole dancing thing was being done back when I was in college and it’s probably a good thing because I’d have never graduated.
Some cool facts: Pole dancing burns an estimated 400 calories per hour. That’s the same as….well I’m not sure what it’s the same as. Maybe skipping rope or swimming? I know one thing: any time you are hoisting your own weight you are building muscle and USING muscles in your arms and abdominals and lower back and Lord knows where else. So say what you will about strippers and pole dancing but you never see one that is out of shape, now do you? Hey, I’m sold! Certainly pole dancing is a lot of fun. Especially for me if I’m going to help my wife. But again, I digress.
And go figure – before I could open my big mouth again, the host of the program asked his guest if “men can learn to pole dance also” and of course the answer is “Yes”. And that led to a perfect opportunity for the host and guest to walk over to a pole that was conveniently set up on the stage.
I was more convinced than ever. This as an activity I could do with my wife! Talk about bonding!
Of course my enthusiasm came crashing down when I learned the portable pole cost nearly $200.00 dollars. And courses that teach pole dancing are far from cheap.
“Looks like I’ll stick to step aerobics…” replied my wife when she heard the price.
“How about if I put in on layaway…?” was my only reply.
No such luck.
But the program did accomplish one thing: it got my wife thinking about other ways of staying in shape. And that’s a good thing. Pole dancing sure would have warmed up the cold months of winter that’s for sure. But who knows, maybe something like belly dancing will prove to be more her style!