It all started last month, when Donald Trump, owner of the Miss USA pageant, decided to give Miss USA Tara Conner a second chance after her bout of underage drinking. Rosie O’Donnell disagreed with Trump’s decision to allow Conner to keep her title and said so openly on the air, spouting off personal insults about Trump that were, I’ll admit, rude and immature. Then Trump, in a petty display of retaliation, shot back at Rosie, calling her “fat” and a “slob”, even making comments about Rosie’s wife Kelli — never actually insulting Kelli (because Kelli is, of course, not fat) — but rather making snide comments about their love life.
Soon, a heated debate had started, with people lining up on either side: either Team Trump or Team Rosie. Trump was appearing as a guest on any show that would have him, supposedly to promote the return of The Apprentice, but also not passing up on the chance to insult O’Donnell at every opportunity. The question soon became: who is right and who is wrong? And even more importantly, does it matter? And why is Barbara Walters involved?
The answer to that last question is simple: to prove that he wasn’t alone in his fierce O’Donnell-loathing, Trump brought Barbara Walters’ name into the mix, claiming that Walters herself badmouthed Rosie directly to Trump, saying that working with her was “hell.” Trump even claimed that Barbara called him to apologize for Rosie’s behavior. After this remark, it was said that Rosie argued with Walters backstage at The View, allegedly calling her a “f*cking liar”. However, representatives for the show claim that this was nothing more than a minor squabble. O’Donnell’s and Walters’ on-air relationship seems fine, as the two seem strong in their effort to unite against the wealthy whiner, but that could be just for the sake of the show.
Once Trump brought Barbara Walters’ name into the debate, the journalist and View co-host fired back on the air, calling him a “poor pathetic man,” and assuring Rosie (and the viewing public) that nothing Trump said she said about O’Donnell was, in any way, true. Perhaps Walters really did say that stuff about Rosie — Trump still maintains she did; he even wrote O’Donnell a letter, albeit a condescencing one, about how they both have reasons to be angry with Walters and informing her specifically of what Walters said to him. Is Trump trying to cause trouble, or is he just being honest? You be the judge.
My opinion is clear: I’m on Team Rosie all the way. Yes, sometimes she has a big mouth and clearly tends to insert her foot into it more times than she can count. And while I do think she should have taken the “high road” (a road that clearly neither celebrity has a map to), I remain on her side and I’ll tell you why: Rosie is a comedian. She’s a loud-mouthed, gum-chewing, Bush-bashing comedian, — kind of like a lesbian Roseanne Barr. Trump claimed that he only sent out his verbal attack dogs because Rosie insulted him and his precious “hair”. But anyone who watches TV knows that’s ridiculous. Rosie isn’t the only one who makes fun of Donald Trump; everyone and their mother makes fun of him. Face it — Trump is even more fodder for late-night comedians and Saturday Night Live skits than Rosie is — even with all her fatness. In fact, on this past Saturday’s episode of SNL, hosted by Jake Gyllenhall, they did a whole skit making fun of Trump, portraying him as an egomaniacal idiot obsessed with only two things: the return of his show, and insulting Rosie O’Donnell.
To be honest, I think the only reason Trump reacted to Rosie’s comments the way he did was because he was highly offended that someone as “disgusting” as Rosie O’Donnell would have the nerve to say any kind of disparaging remark about him. He’s like the rich kid in high school who’s mean to the fat girl because he has nothing to lose; after all, he’s not attracted to her so who cares if he makes her cry. In the end, all Trump did was prove that Rosie’s remarks about him upset him a lot more than his remarks about her. And I firmly believe, as I’m sure others do as well, that of course Trump gave Tara Conner a second chance. She’s Miss USA for crying out loud; that means she’s hot. And everyone knows that if you’re a hot female, Trump will always be in your corner. In other words: according to Trump’s philosophy, it is better to have a bout of underage drinking than to be fat. The former deserves a second chance while the latter deserves nothing but ridicule. What a great role model he is for his five children.