I am a normal woman. I grew up wanting 2 children and the perfect husband. Then I met my perfect man and decided I wanted at least 3 children with him. Sure enough, the first little girl came along, and boy did she change our lives. Not only did she change every aspect of our lives, but she changed our vision for the future as well. We completely underestimated the difficulty of raising a child. When our daughter was first born, I wondered if I even wanted any more children at all. Things got easier around the house while we got used to a new baby. It was then that I began to think about having another one. That is when the anxieties of a 2nd baby began.
I had gotten over the fact that children are difficult to raise. I was prepared and ready for the challenge. My worries were completely different. I began worrying about our current daughter and the time another baby would take from her. I just loved our little girl so much, I couldn’t imagine making her share my time, love, and affection with a brother or sister.
I am an only child, and my husband is the youngest of 2. He assured me that this feeling I had would disappear once the baby was born. He talked to me and made me understand that I would love the new baby just as much as I love our daughter. In my heart I knew that he was right, so we decided to immediately try for another pregnancy.
It was our lucky day, we became pregnant in the first month of trying. Immediately I was excited, but soon after, I began to worry about how our little girl would feel. It broke my heart to think that she might become jealous and think we didn’t love her as much. Four months has passed now and I am happy to say that my anxieties have nearly all disappeared. I now feel our baby kick inside my belly and know that he/she is my baby too. I also know that this new baby is a gift to our daughter just as much as it will be to my husband and I. Family is a blessing. I never had the chance to be loved by a sibling. I am proud to give that opportunity to our children.
I am writing this article to reach out to all women who have anxieties about having a second, third, fourth, etc baby. You are not alone. Although I no longer feel guilt about bringing a second baby into this world, I know there are plenty of mothers who do. All I can say is that time will pass and a new baby will be born. You will love that baby as if it were your first. You will love that baby just as much as your other children. A mother’s heart always makes room for her children, no matter how many there are.