We’ve all heard the red-light cautions when it involves meeting a new love interest at the local bar or night club. Well the truth is, the party scene is the new supermarket when it comes to “practical” dating. Now there are still certain rules to follow and warning signs to watch out for of course, but you should NEVER have to limit your resources because of an old rumored no-no.
#1: The Blushing Bombshell vs. The Flushed Lush
It’s important to hit the club fairly early for a good reason, especially if you’re new to the party scene. This gives you enough time to make your rounds (be seen by everyone), and it allows you to study your environment. Pay attention to people who are parked at the bar most importantly. This means one of two things, either the club is packed and the bar-stool is much more comfortable than standing all night or this person’s only goal consists of ordering another jack and coke without stumbling over the crowd to feed a severe drinking frenzy. So be careful. Make sure a gaze in your direction is a sign of flirting and not just someone trying to focus their beer goggles.
#2: What’s Your Sign?
No one uses pick-up lines anymore, and if for some strange reason they do, please turn them down for the love of humanity. However, out of the murky depths of corny come-ons, a new beast has evolved. “The One Hit Wonder” of dating now prowls the dim, neon-lit corners. This slimy being has the same old speech in hopes of taking someone home for one night only, but luckily you can spot these little devils with ease by simply listening to the lecture.
A few key phrases that might come up are:
“I just come here to get away from the stress of my multi-million dollar company.” (Bragging = Bright red flag. Simply walk away. Let him ramble to someone else about his fortune that probably doesn’t even exist. )
“Oh my God. You’re Carol’s sister right? It’s so good to see you again.” (O.k. if you have never seen this guy before and you have no idea who Carol is, DO NOT talk to him. This is a trickster’s way of trying to weasel into your space by preying on your comfort zone.)
“You wanna get out of here?” (Beware of the Fast and Furious. If the guy isn’t willing to chat for a while, get a basic background of who you are, and start off slow by exchanging phone numbers then the chance for a meaningful relationship is slim to none.)
#3: Can I Buy You a Drink?
When someone offers to buy you a drink, this can either be a social ice breaker or a trap. Here are a couple of examples to help you decide when to accept the offer and when to decline:
Example #1: You laugh. He laughs. Time has slipped away. You two have been chatting for a while now and everything seems to be going great. He offers to buy you a drink. This is a polite thing to do since the two of you are hitting it off so well. The conversation is good and the night looks promising. Accept!
Example #2: A friendly face pops through the crowd. He sees you, walks over, and introduces himself. You spend the first fifteen minutes listening to him talk about his ex-girlfriend, his recent bad relationship, and how much he wants to forget about it. He offers to buy you a drink. Decline!
The lesson is simple. The minute you accept a drink from someone, it’s a subtle suggestion that you’re interested in that person. So the best solution would be to decline unless you intend on spending a little time with that person. Otherwise, you may have some obnoxious guy following you around all night that won’t quit asking if he can buy you another drink.
A New Era
It was once said that the search for love should start in familiar places such as: the supermarket, church, or a friend’s house. That still rings true, but the taboos of yesterday aren’t so unconventional in today’s dating game. Whether it’s online or on a packed dance floor, love will connect with us in one way or another. It will find us clueless, unknowing, and utterly shocked as always. Never prepared but forever willing.