Arrogant, controlling, cocky, and dangerous; why would a woman want to be with a man like that? It’s true, lots of women are attracted to “bad men” but its worse is when they are attracted to criminals, felons, and the incarcerated. Who are these women and why do they fall for men most of us wouldn’t even consider dating? Understand why some women love bed men even when it means risking their lives and family relationships.
It seems the more notorious the criminal the more women that line up to see him and write letters. You would think a man in prison can’t have a girlfriend but, you would be surprised how many available women are available to felons even if they aren’t in the public spotlight. Some couples meet by visitation, letter writing, and others by phone. Typically it tends to be the woman reaching out to the men, but why? Bank robbers, murderers, rapists, and serial killers don’t seem like people women would want to have a relationship with. Many are attracted to the danger and all are fascinated if not infatuated with the bad man of their desires.
Some women move miles away from family and friends to be with these men while others still take 2-3 hour long trips to go visit these men at jail. Women who love men behind bars let it rule their lives. Their daily routine tends to revolve around jail visitation hours making parenting, work, and even day to day life more difficult than it would be under normal circumstances. Women who love and marry men behind bars constantly play the victim time and time again. These relationships with men behind bars can have disastrous effects on the children and family of the woman involved.
How does something like this happen to what seems a totally normal woman? Well, most women that love bad men tend to have one thing in common; they are all insecure. They want someone to love them and they want to feel wanted. Usually they are lonely, don’t have many friends, and often don’t have strong relationships with family. But, don’t be fooled because it can happen to anyone. Even a married woman may fall for a man behind bars and risk her life for him.
Women who love bad men are looking for danger, excitement, and unconditional love. All of these traits are commonly found in criminals which makes it understandable why these women fall for these men. Men behind bars are taken care of; the women don’t have to worry about where he is because he is always in the same place, jail. They don’t have to clothe, feed, or clean up after these men, which I assume is part of the obsession.
How can you tell if a woman you know is involved with a felon or someone that is incarcerated? There are often not a lot of signs but if you pay attention there are clues that you can see. Often the relationship is a secret or the woman doesn’t introduce the man for months, if at all. Women who are normally outgoing can be quiet, timid even, and won’t talk much when they are with these bad men. She will risk everything for the prisoner, even if it means loosing a job, estrangement of family members, and even suffering financial loss.
And what if she wants to marry this man behind bars? When it comes right down to it most women would throw away everything to be with these men. Trying to stop the marriage or refusing to speak to her usually won’t work. There are lots of hardships and pain when it comes to dating someone behind bars, but when it comes to marriage there is more at stake than these women think. Typically it tends to be a very lonely marriage, it can be very hard for the children to deal with, and often it ends with divorce. Overall, it doesn’t really seem worth all the trouble but women are putting themselves through this everyday.
Generally relationships with men behind bars tend to take a serious tone very, very quickly. Many women involved with men like that describe the relationship as a whirlwind, fast, and sometimes volatile. Sometimes the women actually do have something in common with the incarcerated like both being molested or abused as a child but these kind of things are often not a solid basis for a relationship and things can go wrong at any time.
For women who love bad men there are deeper issues that need to be dealt with other than their choice of man. A woman’s relationship with a prisoner can be detrimental to all aspects of her life and those involved in it. Women who fall for men behind bars have psychological and emotional issues that need to be dealt with, sooner rather than later. Families need to become tighter knit as they were in the past in order to avoid problems like this in the future.